Monday, February 9, 2009

School Homework - Essay: My Ideal Holiday Destination

For the first time this year I actually had fun doing homework and though all good things do come to an end, I would like to commemorate this day with this post. If most days are like this, it'd be heaven enough.

My teacher's biggest possible mistake: she didn't set a limit on word count.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

How I discovered the place would be an utterly different story so I shall skip that part and perhaps whisk you through it some other day. On the fifth day of the Chinese New Year holiday 2009, my family was invited to dine with dad's friend from Japan.
"Are you sure you don't want to go?" my sister, Japhia asked me.
"Yea, you guys go ahead and have fun. I have plans for the day so I won't be home early," I told mom.
"Okay, you be good. Don't stay out too late," mom said.
"You really, really don't want to go? You'll be missing out. We'll be having abalone, shark fin and all the most amazing food you can ever imagine," Japhia tried to tempt me.
"Not this time, Japhia. I'm not one bit tempted. Bye."
"Fine," she replied. "Bye."
The moment the car left, I grabbed my backpack from behind the sofa and headed out to the dumpsite. A bizarre place to want to be at I know, but you'll soon see why. Right by the corner of the dumpsite was a tree. I pushed my way pass all the bags of rubbish, covering my flat nose with two crumpled pieces of tissue paper stuffed up my nostrils and finally reached the tree by the corner. I hugged the tree, kissed it and immediately vanished through it's bark. Like the last time I was there, a strong gush of wind was pounding at my body but at the same time, I was moving upwards, against the direction of the wind and against gravity. It's incredulous but true. In seconds, I was in a completely different place. Elkana Duroy. The first time I entered Elkana Duroy, I thought I was dead and in heaven. Then I dismissed the thought of it being heaven almost instantly when I remembered the day before I discovered the place, I quarreled with my sister so I thought I was in hell. Turns out Elkana Duroy is neither heaven nor hell.
"You, you!" a dwyb greeted me.
Dwybs are one of many creatures of Elkana Duroy. Dwybs are stout and only knee-high. According to my memory, the most intelligent creatures of Elkana Duroy but the thing about dwybs is that they hate being called intelligent so they act stupid; so incredibly stupid that sometimes these fake twits can get on your nerves.
"Hey, do you know where I can find Zircon?" I asked the dwyb.
"What's a zircon?" the little creature questioned.
"The elyora, Zircon. You can't possibly be that stupid, can you?" I remarked.
Elyoras are probably the most beautiful among the creatures of Elkana Duroy.The upper body of elyoras are almost human features, with big eyes, sharp noses and luscious lips but instead of legs, they end in spiral limbs with sparkly skin.
"I'm stupid indeed. WEEEWEEEWEEEWEEE!" The dwyb went.
I sighed. Thank goodness Zircon came to my rescue.
"Jaaa..nnnaaa! You're back, back, back! That's just whack!" she squealed a song as she pulled me into her embrace.
Right, I forgot to mention that elyoras speak in songs.
"Hey, but I won't be hanging around for long though."
"Then we must make the most of todayyyyy!" she sang on.
"Alright, take me. I can't fly."
Zircon looked at me, rather puzzled. "Fly?" she chirped. "Fly, fly? We don't fly! Nothing in Elkana Duroy flies!"
Zircon circled around me then took me by my hands and sang, "You've got to think it and you'll be there. Imagine away and you'll be sauntering there!"
"Right, yes, I forgot," I said. I closed my eyes and imagined a path in front of me that went higher and higher. I took one step at a time and when I opened my eyes, I was about three metres above from the weirdly shaped glassy foundation which is known as the icebyss of Elkana Duroy as it is written in The HolyMoly Great Book of Ah. Speaking of The HolyMoly Great Book of Ah, it was written aeons ago by the ancestors of Elkana Duroy.
"Good job, Janna, great work. Now you just have to try it with your eyes open...it's not wise, no it isn't, to move around shutting your eyes, it's not wise," Zircon vocalized.
I tried with my eyes opened but the first time, my body slammed against the icebyss. The second time, I sauntered into the place like the rest.
The first thing we did was glide above the glassy shield over flowers and tendrils to visit the toodletwixes. Toodletwixes are skinny miniatures of humans except that they have no ears and only slits for lips. The tallest of the toodletwixes is two heads shorter than I. The toodletwixes warmly welcomed me by dancing around me and I caught up with their steps to join in their dance. Then, I introduced a dance they had never seen before - hip hop. The toodletwixes as well as some other creatures who were present looked at me in awe.
"Fantabulousicola!" one toodletwix commented.
Another thing about toodletwixes are that they think of themselves as sesquipedalians, except that most of their pseudovocabulary is superfluous and cannot be translated.
"Awesomazingly incredibleblablu!" another toodletwix said.
Since then, the toodletwixes' dance was never the same.
Zircon then wanted to bring me to Whoopee Park of Elkana Duroy which was operated by the blobs. Blobs are rubbery, gooey creatures the size of a tennis ball but could stretch to about a hundred yards. At Whoopee Park, Vyolyn, a green-haired elyora and Feera, a toodletwix joined us.The first ride we went on was the SloMo Wheel. The ride goes like this: a blob stretches around ten creatures and another blob sticks to the stretched blob then spins it on high speed. The blob hinged and locked one small part of itself around my left hand and without further ado, spun me and nine other creatures faster than even a fan could go on Earth. I screamed so loud that another blob had to spread itself across my mouth to prevent me from waking the wizzles who were sleepy fastidious creatures. The first thing I did when we got off the ride was barf. I wanted to leave Whoopee Park that very instant for I was certainly not curious about how the other rides went but Zircon insisted we went on the Toss N' Turn. It was the most deranged, out of the world ride ever in the history of mankind and alien. Those blobs would throw twenty beings in the air at a time in such a way that all twenty beings would sommersault all the way up and back down falling to the blob and bounce back up again. This process repeats itself for about five minutes. Seriously, who in their right minds would go on this ride and trust a blob the size of a tennis ball to actually catch them as well as nineteen other creatures at the same time? Only a moronic, nonsensical, lunatic of unsound mind would ever want to go on such a ride.
When we got off the ride, I ran my fingers through my hair to comb it.
"Let's go on the WallaWee now! The Wallawee! It's going to be super fun and crazy!" Vyolyn chirped.
"NO!" I shrieked. "Please, that's enough for the day. I'm hungry."
"A snackidoobeeyum!" Feera the toodletwix said.
"I'll go, oh yes I'll go get us a treat. Something sweet!" Zircon sang.
"That would be great, thank you," I uttered gratefully.
Not long after that, Zircon came back with black truffles on flaky pastry. My jaw dropped at the sight of those heavenly slivers of truffles.
"This is the snack? As in...just a snack?!" I asked, shocked.
"You don't like it? I'm so sorry, I truly am but it was the only thing I could get my hands on - and the easiest - in such a short period of time," Zircon yodeled a sad melody.
"Oh no, don't be silly. I love it. I'm just...surprised," I remarked.
Surprised would be an understatement as black truffles are nicknamed black diamonds for they are worth close to it; and the fragrance is truly tempting my palate. Here in Elkana Duroy, truffles are snacks not unlike fast food!
"I've got an idea, let's go to my place for snowflakes for an accompaniment. I know you will love it, no doubt!" Vyolyn squealed.
I had no idea what snowflakes were to them but Zircon and Feera made them sound delectable so off we went to Vyolyn's place.
Vyolyn's place was simply majestic and gorgeous. It was like an ice sculpture of two huge wings curled inwards to form a home. We were warmly greeted by Vyolyn's mother, Yzyvch (pronounced as ee-wish).
"Please, sit and make yourselves at home," Yzyvch chirped delightfully. "Snowflakes will be on it's way."
We thanked her. Then, Zircon, Feera and Vyolyn settled on the pink curls of tendril-like chairs.
"I don't think that's going to hold my weight," I said, turning red.
"Nonsensicrapulosa!" Feera articulated.
"Nonsense indeed. Just believe, yea, that's all you've got to do - believe!" Zircon sang.
True enough, I believed and it held my weight. At first, I didn't feel too comfortable but once Yzyvch came with the snowflakes, I had forgotten that I was actually sitting on something so fragile that would not hold my weight according to the physical laws on Earth. Without a doubt, snowflakes make the most scrumptious dessert I've ever tasted. It was a combination of cold, sweet, sour and fizzy all at the same time.
"Have you taken her to Melodia? No doubt she'll love it there. I heard she danced so well with the toodletwixes, she should go to Melodia!" Yzyvch sang, a very lovely tune in fact.
"Melodia!" Zircon chirped.
"Melodia!" Vyolyn echoed.
"Let's go to Melodia, she'll love it there. Oh she will, yes she will. To Melodia, we will!" Zircon and Vyolyn harmonized.
Our next destination was breathtaking. Melodia turned out to be a place completely devoted to music. Gigantic colourful piano-like keys flowing with an accordian effect and silver pipes of different height nicely placed side by side. There also were golden cymbals next to the pipes of different sizes and height.The cymbals that can churn out melody were held by blue twirls of clouds which play as the dancers' synchronised movements pluck at the twirls.
"Favouritarara song?" Feera asked me.
"You mean my favourite song?" I asked.
Feera nodded. I took out my mp3 player from my backpack and let them listen to Canon in D by Pachelbel.
"Easiendara!" Feera sqealed.
At once, a combination of the creatures of Elkana Duroy danced around the place on the piano-like keys and somehow playing every other instrument in their dance. I have never heard a better version of Canon in D than in Melodia. It was so beautifully played that I almost cried. Once they were done with Canon in D, they played some other songs which could put Canon in D itself to shame. Wait, I rephrase. Not just Canon in D but every other song in the world that any orchestra and music prodigy on Earth could think of.
"Gracious, I love Elkana Duroy!" I shouted and immediately, almost everything halted.
"Janna..." Zircon sang sweetly. "It's time, we have to go...."
"Where to?" I asked.
"Right up to Apex, to determine the future of Elkana Duroy!" Vyolyn vocalized.
I didn't understand a thing at that time so I followed them. We went all the way up and passed an orange jelly-like layer. There I saw twelve different creatures sitting on glittery snow sculpted thrones. I only could recognize five creatures: an elyora, a toodletwix, a dwyb, a blob and the one with droopy eyes ought to be the wizzle.
"Enchoahorbubu zryonewalababa mrlyalalululu," a rather old-looking toodletwix said.
"We've been waiting for a very long time for you," a dwyb translated.
"What language is that? And what do you mean?" I questioned, utterly curious and rather scared.
"It's the ancient language of Elkana Duroy. Soon, Elkana Duroy English would be the only spoken language," the dwyb said. "And it means that we've been expecting you."
The dwyb didn't seem to be too discreet about being intelligent but then I remembered that Zircon had once told me that there was only one dwyb who does not put on a facade having to represent all dwybs. This decision was made only after being promised that no one shall insult the dwyb by calling her intelligent.
"Expecting me? Why?" I asked.
"Introduce yourself first," the dwyb demanded.
"Err...hi, I'm Janna."
"That's not the way to introduce yourself. I am Encarta, a dwyb of Felomonte Zjerkovince Herloa of the great Myneova of Elkana Duroy."
"Oh, I am Janna, a human being of...Ipoh, Perak, Malaysia, the Earth of the Universe?"
The twelve creatures chuckled, but not for long.
"Har el zentiera The HolyMoly Great Book of Ah, ser ho encavlos vy en bouvle tzon swetkyl berlyo victa Elkana Duroy zyen qvylien," one of the unknown creatures said.
"According to The HolyMoly Great Book of Ah, the first Homo sapien to discover Elkana Duroy, returns the second time and declares that he or she loves Elkana Duroy, becomes queen and would unite Earth and Elkana Duroy that they would be one and never would one treat the other as alien," the dwyb translated.
"Me? I become Queen of Elkana Duroy? You mean it's written in The HolyMoly Great Book of Aaahhhhhhh?" I asked.
"My dear, it's Ah," the elyora sang. "The HolyMoly Great Book of Ah, not Aaahhhh!"
Fear and excitement came over me almost simultaneously. That would mean I rule Elkana Duroy! I'm queen!
"Yes, according to your dictionaries, queen would mean..." another unknown creature blinked and immediately, the world wide web was projected, logged on to www.dictionary.com. "a female sovereign or monarch et cetera right?"
I nodded vigorously. "Is that what I am to do now? Rule Elkana Duroy?"
"In your dreams, you dimwit. Not now but the time will come" the dwyb laughed. "We will watch over you and Elkana Duroy is now your home."
"Thank you." I looked at my watch and gasped.
"Gracious. I'm super late. I must go," I said.
"But we have plenty more to teach and tell you," another creature said as it touched my shoulder.
"I promise I'll return," I said. "But now the Queen of Elkana Duroy is about to get a good spanking if I am any later."
"Very well then. Close your eyes," the dwyb said.
A split second later, I was by the tree, surrounded by garbage. I ran home, reminiscing about Elkana Duroy. It was an awesome adventure for a holiday break.
"Darn it, you stink! Where were you? The dumpsite?!" my sister shrieked.
I headed for the bathroom, ignoring her. I stripped immediately for I, myself could not stand the stench. Then I caught a glimpse of the back of my right shoulder. I placed my hand there and I felt a sudden coldness. I turned my back to the mirror. A shimmering inscription of ancient writing was permanently etched on my skin. I smiled...until I thought about Earth.

4 comments:

Joshua said...

"A shimmering inscription of ancient writing was permanently etched on my skin."

Uh-oh. What's your parents going to think when they see you've got a tattoo? Hahaha. :D That was a nice story.

In my Physical Fitness class, my friend Mike and I would pass notes constantly. The teacher, Ms. Godwin, was pretty cool and pretty cool with it. This particular day she looked over at us passing notes and said, with this particularly charming smile, "Boys, do you need me to give you something to do?" We, being cheeky, said, "Sure!" So, she told us to write an autobiography to be handed to her at the end of class. I went with a similar, silly, fantastical style that you just did. Heh. When she read it, she asked me, "Uh, Josh, do you really believe this?" I replied, "Nope. I was just being silly." She kind of half sighed and went, "Ah, I was just making sure. I'm not really into all this fantasy stuff." Haha. :)

Joshua said...

Hahaha. The verification word is "dooke". :P

CBB said...

i see lines. lol.nice story!! and inetersting names indeed.

sabrinaC said...

i needed to scroll like 5 times down on my mouse just to reach the end of your post -_-